Category Archives: Life

Huh. When did that happen?

I have had body image issues for as long as I can remember. I think it came to a head in high school when I started getting “teased” about being pudgy. Looking back, I know that weighing 159 pounds at 5’11” tall really isn’t pudgy; it’s well within the normal weight range for my height. I worked hard and got my weight down to 135 pounds and began what became a lifelong habit of counting calories.

By the time I went to college, I think I was dangerously close to developing an eating disorder. I decided I needed to lose even more weight. My goal was to get down to 120 pounds. My body decided that was a no-go. I started working on losing weight and I got so sick. There are a couple of weeks that I don’t remember. I was somehow still going to at least some of my classes, but I’m not sure how. Once I got better I decided to let my weight stay where it was.

The next hurdle was pregnancy. I worried about how I would deal with the weight gain that goes along with pregnancy should I decide to have kids. I honestly wasn’t sure that I would be able to let myself gain weight. However, when I actually got pregnant at 24, my body once again took control. At that point in my life I was skipping meals or just eating something like a pack of crackers. Once I got pregnant, I had to eat every two hours or my stomach would be growling loud enough for others to hear. My body basically forced me to take in the nutrients that both my baby and I needed. I gained a total of 28 pounds during my pregnancy and was able to lose it all within 6 months after giving birth. The fact that I gained weight and successfully lost it seemed to change something in me. So much so that with my second pregnancy, I actually gained 40 pounds; I decided that if I was going to gain weight anyway, I may as well enjoy the process. I ate a lot of peanut M&Ms, LOL. However, I was once again able to lose all of the weight within 6 months. I also did not throat punch the coworker who commented about me “still carrying all of that baby weight” when I returned to work after my maternity leave. At that point, I only had 15 pounds left to lose. Sigh.🙄

Then, along comes hypothyroidism. Even though I’m on medication to treat my hypothyroidism, it still makes it easier for me to gain weight and harder to lose it. Slowly, over an extended period, my weight crept back up to high school levels and I worked to lose 15 pounds. This left my final weight higher than it was for so many years, but I was okay with that. The cycle repeated again a few years later. I’ve been struggling to lose weight and have been frustrated with myself. However, once I started my part-time job, I’ve slowly begun to take the weight off. (Yay for being more active!)

So, why have I made this post with TMI about my weight? Well, now that I’m 60, aging and such have been on my mind. During the course of my musings I had an unexpected realization. For the first time in my life, I’m comfortable with the body that I have – cellulite, aging skin, and all. I’m not exactly sure when this acceptance occurred, but I’m glad it did. Always striving for some impossible level of perfection is exhausting.

I guess the change has been coming on for a few years. Prior to retirement, I wouldn’t leave the house without at least some level of makeup. I loosened up a little in the months after retirement… and then COVID hit and no one was going anywhere. Makeup kind of went out the window and pretty much stayed there. I now regularly leave the house with no makeup or minimum makeup. As a matter of fact, my coworkers don’t even know what I look like with makeup. Why put on makeup just to sweat it off?

Minimal makeup so I could try out my new lipstick

I’ve been a long time reaching this level of comfort with myself, but I’m glad I finally got here. How about you? Are you comfortable with yourself?

The Big Six-Oh!

As of 5:10am on Sunday, November 20th, I am officially sixty years old. Wow. How the heck did that happen?😮 Mentally, I’m still around twenty-five. Yes, my sons are in their thirties, but that doesn’t seem to have an impact on my mental age. Aging is one of those things that, until now, hasn’t really impacted me.

Kenn turned sixty in August. One day recently, he stopped and asked “Are you having a hard time with turning sixty?” I had to give the question some thought. The best answer I could come up with was “Maybe a little bit.” Don’t get me wrong, I’m not huddled in a darkened room binging on Ding Dongs and baking shows, but turning sixty has been… thought provoking. Kenn said it was a little harder for him too – not necessarily his own age but the realization that our oldest son will be forty in a few short years. (My brain and fingers insist it should be spelled “fourty”.) Oddly enough, it was a similar situation for me in that it wasn’t my own age that was a bit of an eye opener. I’m the baby of my family; my sisters are nine and ten years older. In September of 2021, while we were on our road trip up the East coast, my oldest sister had a stroke. I was shocked to realize that she was only six months shy of turning seventy. Whoa. Before I know it, I’ll be the one turning seventy. (Good Lord willing and the creek don’t rise, as my Grandmama used to say.)

A couple of months ago, Kenn asked what I wanted to do for my birthday. My answer was immediate: I wanted to take the camper to Amicalola Falls State Park for the weekend. I was long overdue for a soul recharge in the mountains. Being the good hubby that he is, Kenn had gone online and made reservations before we finished our conversation. The trip was wonderful and relaxing, just what I needed. We did a little hiking and a lot of being lazy. We even caught part of a raptor show at the Lodge.

Scirocco the red-tailed hawk
This is what sixty looks like

Due to the temperatures (forties in the day, twenties at night), we weren’t allowed to keep the “city water” connected to the camper full time. Instead, we had to put water in our fresh water tank for use at night. (We have tank heaters to keep the water from freezing.) However, this was when we discovered that something wasn’t working right. Instead of a steady stream of water from the fresh water tank, we only got spits and spurts. In addition to being frustrating, it gave us a problem that we needed to figure out before we take the camper to the Asheville, NC area for New Year’s. Kenn informed me last night that the problem has been resolved. (Yay!) Fortunately, it was something relatively simple; one of the valves was in “winterize” mode. Once he switched the valve, everything started working correctly. Whew!

So, how well are you dealing with aging?

Soul Searching

Fellow blogger Jessica at Jeweled Again By Jessica has had a couple of posts recently that have really resonated with me. While she’s been struggling to decide if she should continue with her art or throw in the towel, I’ve been struggling to make the same decision about my fiction writing. Writing has always brought me joy – or at least it used to. I’ve spent most of this year trying to decide how I want to proceed and am still no closer to a decision than I was in February.

Image courtesy of DepositPhotos.com

I fell in love with creative writing in high school and spent years wanting to write stories. However, I didn’t actually start until I was 47 and discovered the world of fan fiction. I wrote several stories based in the world of Mass Effect, my favorite video game series. The positive feedback I received on those stories gave me the courage to begin writing original stories. I decided to write under a pen name, Isabella Norse, since I write romance and worked in IT which is still a male-dominated field. I knew if any of my coworkers were to find out, I’d never hear the end of it and I didn’t want to have to hurt anyone, LOL. The decision to write under a pen name is one of those things that I would change if I could go back in time. I don’t like having to be two people, especially since, as a writer, I’m pretty much expected to be on all of the social media sites and I hate it. Izzy has FB, Twitter, IG, and Pinterest accounts, and even has a separate blog – pretty much all of them inactive. Sigh. It would be easier if I could just be Linda. However, I haven’t figured out the best way to combine me and Izzy into one. Double sigh.

One of my biggest problems has been “finding my tribe”. As best I can tell, this consists of being really good at tooting your own horn on social media. Since I’ve already said that Izzy’s SM accounts are pretty much inactive, it’s a safe bet that I ‘m not good at this. As a matter of fact, it would be safe to say that I completely suck at the marketing portion of writing. The whole “look at me, look at me, look at me” aspect of marketing is completely anathema to me. Triple sigh. Honestly, I don’t care if I’m ever a New York Times Bestselling Author but I would like to have some readers, LOL. (Thanks for reading my stories Jessica!🥰)

I’m a hybrid author which means I’ve self-published a few stories and have others published with a couple of small presses. One of the small presses recently returned the rights to my sweet paranormal romance series; their business took a hit during the pandemic so they are downsizing. I wasn’t the only author published with them impacted. However, my feelings weren’t hurt. I was already planning to ask them for my rights back; my stories just weren’t the best fit with with their imprint and I wanted the ability and freedom to rebrand and advertise my stories as I see fit.

Honestly, I miss writing for the joy of it. Now, even when I’m working on a story I enjoy, part of my mind is wondering if it’s even worth the trouble, if anyone will ever read it. Kenn tells me I should just write for myself and not worry about readers, etc. I wish I could. However, my brain just doesn’t work that way. Quadruple sigh.

I’ve considered stopping my creative writing and just continuing with this blog. I get to interact with people here! However, the thought of completely giving up on my stories has caused more than one panic attack. I guess that, in itself, is an answer. I’ve just got to come up with a way to muzzle the part of me that likes to put a damper on things with its negativity.

Thanks for listening while I vented. It helped and I appreciate each and every one of you!😘

Here We Go Again…

If you’ve followed me for any time there are a couple of things you may know about me:

  • First, I’m a writer. I write under the pen name Isabella Norse.
  • Second, I participate in the annual madness known as National Novel Writing Month where I attempt to write 50,000 words in 30 days ( or less).

I debated not participating this year but decided on Oct 31st to go ahead and go for it.

I’m a pantser which means I don’t outline, I write by “the seat of my pants” . I’ve always been this way. Even in high school when I had papers to write and teachers expected outlines, I was baffled. How was I supposed to know what I was going to write until I wrote it? The outlines that I had to turn in in advance of the finished paper were complete works of fiction.🤷‍♀️When I start a story I know who my main characters are, how the story begins and ends and random bits in the middle; the rest comes to me as I write. I’m pantsing a little more than usual this year because at this point my heroine doesn’t have a name, LOL. I’m also writing in a different genre this year. In years past I’ve been focusing on my sweet paranormal romance series. I decided I need a change so this year I’m going to be working on an urban fantasy with a middle-aged heroine. (Why should the twenty-somethings always get to save the world?) Since I always have to have a title when I begin a story this one is called Menopause and Mayhem. I even used Canva to create a book cover to use on the NaNo site. I’m looking forward to just having fun this month, even if I don’t reach the 50K goal.

Wish me luck!

“You’re doing it backwards.”

I am right-handed. No big surprise there since it’s estimated that 90% of the population is right-handed. However, I am somewhat ambidextrous and there are many random things that I do left-handed. I don’t really pay attention to what those things are until something or someone calls my attention to it. The first time I remember this happening was when I began working my first part-time job at a fast food restaurant in my teens. Let’s face it, wrapping a sandwich in a paper wrapper isn’t rocket science. My trainer showed me the correct wrapping procedure and had me emulate him. He then cocked his head at me and furrowed his brow. “Do that again,” he instructed. I did it again. “You’re doing it backwards,” was his determination. Backwards? How could I possibly be wrapping a sandwich backwards? After some experimentation, we realized that I was wrapping them left-handed as opposed to his right-handed method.

Random things I do left-handed:

  • Wrapping sandwiches
  • Dealing cards
  • Counting money
  • Opening screw-top bottles and jars and pop-tab cans
  • Opening doors
  • Weeding
  • Counting weevil larvae

Wait, counting weevil larvae? Yes, dear reader, you read that correctly.

Weevil larvae. Not for the faint of heart.

Since my new part-time job involves working for an entomologist, bugs are always a possibility. Currently, once a week, I hand-count a few thousand weevil larvae. (Exciting, right?) About halfway through the process the mild arthritis in my left shoulder reminds me that counting is something I do left-handed. Kenn would tell me to just switch to counting right-handed, but that wouldn’t work. Trying to count larvae (or anything actually) right-handed would just take longer and result in many dropped weevils. I’ll just be taking ibuprofen on weevil counting days, LOL.

So, are you right or left-handed? Are you ambidextrous?

‘Tis the Season. Not.

I. Love. Christmas. It is by far my favorite holiday. While I detest shopping for myself, I love shopping for the perfect gifts/stocking stuffers for my family members. That said, I am not mentally prepared to be bombarded with Christmas decorations as soon as I enter a store. (I’m looking at you, Walmart.) Where’s the Halloween? Where’s the Thanksgiving? *squints* Oh, yeah. They’re wedged into that corner over there. (Insert biggest of eye rolls)

Image courtesy of depositphotos.com

And don’t even get me started on Christmas music. Once again, I love Christmas music. My Christmas CDs come out the day after Thanksgiving. Christmas music in October just makes me angry, LOL. At least I’ve managed to avoid the cinnamon brooms that come out this time of year; they give me a terrible headache.

Even though I’m anti-Christmas-decorations-in-October, there’s a part of me that’s starting to get a little panicky about the fact that I haven’t started shopping for stocking stuffers yet. I’ve even got two new family members to shop for. (Note to self: buy Christmas stockings for the twins.) True, the twins will only be 10.5 months old at Christmas so they won’t care, but it matters to me!

What’s your biggest holiday pet peeve?

The Great Drawer Dilemma

Owning a travel trailer comes with all of the joys and pains that go along with traditional home ownership. However, unlike a traditional home, the travel trailer bounces around which puts unique stresses on everything. One of the things that drove our decision to purchase our Micro Lite 21FBRS was the amount of storage – especially in the kitchen. In addition to two small drawers for utensils and such, there are two deep drawers perfect for holding pots and pans and other larger miscellany. However, those large drawers have been problematic from the beginning.

Opening a drawer in your traditional home is simple, you place your hand on the drawer knob and pull. Easy peasy. Opening a drawer in a travel trailer requires a bit of a tug; that extra bit of tension is required in order to (usually) keep the drawers from bouncing open when on the road. Early into our travels with Serenity (our 21FBRS) I kept finding pieces of “stuff” in the bottom drawer. Obviously, something was malfunctioning, but what? The what became clearer when the top drawer got harder and harder to open. It turned out that the drawer slide on the top drawer was failing and that where the random pieces were coming from. Kenn replaced the drawer slide and we thought that was that. Wrong.

During one of our last trips, I was getting ready to cook supper but I couldn’t get the bottom drawer open. Without the pots and pans in that drawer, no cooking transpires. I assumed something in the drawer had shifted, preventing it from opening. Wrong again.

It turned out that the bottom of the drawer had collapsed. We had to remove the top drawer in order to empty the bottom drawer and then wrestle it out of the cabinet. In order to save weight, many drawers and such in travel trailers and rvs are made from thin wood veneers; while these materials are lighter, they aren’t always sturdy. Kenn has already replaced the “floor” of the closet next to our fridge because it broke during my month-long stay in SC earlier this year.

Rather than tack the chintzy bottom of the drawer back in place, Kenn decided to just rebuild the entire drawer out of plywood. Once that was done he decided to go ahead and rebuild the other drawer as well instead of waiting for it to fail at some future date. While the new and improved drawers should last for years to come they have created issues of their own. Due to the increased weight of the drawers, new slides were required along with some sort of mechanism to keep the drawers closed while traveling.

The first device Kenn purchased to secure the drawers didn’t work out, but we had a weekend trip planned. As a temporary alternative he installed some childproof/cat proof latches of the same type we use on our kitchen cabinets in The Cabin. (Our kids are grown, but Nyx, our black cat, is fixated on the kitchen cabinets and refuses to leave them alone.) However, the latches were not strong enough to contain the drawers. Fortunately, we always stop a few miles from the house to attach the weight distribution hitch so we discovered the problem with the latches early on. Cue the arguing.

If you want to stress test your marriage, or if you just like stress, buy a travel trailer! I’m convinced that getting a camper backed into a site has led to the demise of more than one marriage. Kenn and I don’t argue much, but when we do it’s more than likely going to deal with navigation or something to do with the travel trailer. When we discovered that the existing latches weren’t going to keep the drawers secured, my recommendation was to just remove the drawers, leaving the contents in place, and put them in the bed of the truck. Kenn wanted to use bungee cords to secure the drawers to the faucet. This was a big NOPE from me. One of the first thing we did after buying Serenity was to replace the default kitchen faucet with a nice gooseneck faucet with a pull-down sprayer. I didn’t want to get several miles down the road only to find that not only were the drawers not secure but that we also had to replace the faucet. Basically, I wanted to err on the side of caution. After several rounds of both of us repeating ourselves, Kenn emptied the drawer contents into a container and then stored the container and the drawers in the bed of the truck. This in turn was followed by several uncomfortable hours of little to no communication. You’d think after thirty-six years of marriage, we would have learned how to argue. Not so much.

A permanent solution for securing the drawers is still in the works. Kenn has some industrial strength magnets on order so we’ll find out how well those work on our next trip. Once the drawer issue is resolved we need to figure out why the oven door insists on being cattywampus and why the stove burners keep falling off.

How do you keep disagreements from turning into arguments/pouting?

A Redhead State of Mind

I am a redhead. I have always loved having red hair; it’s part of what makes me unique. Not only is red hair the rarest hair color, but my combination of red hair and blue eyes is the rarest hair/eye color combination. Now, I am aware that I am aging and that my hair color is fading. I like to say I’m “going blonde”. Most redheads don’t go straight from red hair to gray/white; we go through a blonde phase in between.

Even though I know my hair color is fading, I still think of myself as a redhead. However, a couple of recent interactions have made me wonder. At work, one of my coworkers was going to show me how to do something new and I asked her to give me a minute to grab my shirt and sun hat. (Being fair-skinned usually goes along with red hair. In addition to wearing sunscreen, I also wear a long-sleeved shirt and a big sun hat when spending time outside.) As we walked out of the building, the coworker glanced at me and then my hair and then said, “You have… red hair, right?” I chuckled and told her that yes, I do even though it is fading. We then began a discussion of some of the unique traits that tend to accompany red hair.

Several days later, I went to my appointment to get my employee ID. (I’ve been working for a little over two months, but better late than never I guess.) I had my photo taken and a lot of my data was transferred from my drivers license. The technician verified a few things such as eye color. When she got to my hair color she looked at me, then squinted at me and asked, “What color is your hair?” When I said “Red” she said “Really?” Once again I explained that yes, my hair color is getting lighter and will eventually become blonde. She said that she really didn’t see the red so my hair color will be listed as blonde on my ID.🤷‍♀️🙄

So, dear readers, I am now asking you: what color is my hair?

Large Headed Ladies

I think the time has come for a new song in the vein of Queen’s classic, Fat Bottomed Girls. The new song should be titled Large Headed Ladies and I volunteer to star in the music video. I look in the mirror and I see a normal, average human being. However, looks can be deceiving and I’m apparently a living chibi or Funko Pop. (Both are characters with large heads.) I generally don’t wear hats for the simple reason that most don’t fit. One size fits all? Ha! Not hardly. Between a large head and extremely thick hair, most “one size” hats just perch precariously on top of my head.

During our visit to Wall Drug, we found a western wear store that sold hats that came in (gasp!) actual sizes. Since that day, I have been the proud owner of a genuine Stetson cowboy hat.

Yee haw!

When I started my part-time job, I needed a sun hat. It took two attempts to find the one pictured in the linked post. I bought the first hat based on a Facebook ad with reviews which mentioned the hat fitting larger heads. Ha! It was so small I gave it to my nine year old grandson. Fortunately, the next hat was a success. Not only does it fit, but the vivid orange makes me easy to find when I’m working out in the orchards.

The most recent hurdle has been trying to find a bicycle helmet. Several months ago, Kenn purchased collapsible bikes for us to take with us when we camp. Sadly, we have yet to use them. We decided a few weeks ago to remedy that situation but that meant finding helmets. Of course it was a cinch for Kenn but for me, not so much. I carefully measured my head and made sure to purchase an appropriately sized helmet. Guess what? It didn’t fit. 🤦‍♀️ So, it was back to the drawing board. Thank goodness for LtMacDaddy and his amazing Amazon review. I purchased the same helmet and he is correct; the helmet also fits my fat head!

Success!

It’s a shame that adults don’t get to wear sparkly multi-colored helmets like kids do. (I’d wear a unicorn helmet in a heartbeat.) While the red is nice, it’s boring. I may apply a coat of my Lisa Frank nail polish to give it a little sparkle. Another downside to owning a red and black helmet as a resident of the state of Georgia is that it will be assumed to have been chosen in support of the University of Georgia Bulldogs. Spoiler alert: it was not and I am not a Bulldogs (or any other team) fan.

So, are you a member of the Large Head Club? If not, what is it like to be able to purchase hats off the rack (so to speak)?